The sparks I feel when I'm in love
When I thought I could return to reality
But oh was I wrong
The craziness that is the landscape on the otherwise so plain fields of being
Glimpses onto normality and ignorant dismissal of challenging ideas
But what is life without the urge of having the possibility of ending it all
I really want to explore psychedelic substances
but I'm afraid they'll just intensify feelings of unrest and mess everything up even so much more. Though I think I could learn things. Experience.
What I am looking for is honesty in every way
and maybe that's not so easily possible under normal conditions
perhaps some kind of distance is really helpful; I don't know
But to truly learn about existence and being, how could that ever function properly without the knowledge of real information and knowledge that is truth!
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I'm saddened by how fucking stupid my own emotions and thoughts make me feel sometimes.
ReplyDeleteIf I don't understand my own irrational behaviour; there's still resons for it.
And it's very difficult to accept those things.
But that's the only way to try to work with them, or then work on them.